Stalkered
by Kooly
Summary: Yeah so what happens when Ichigo is harassed by a supposed to be dead Espada? Well I don't know, you should tell me! For sh!ts and giggles. Mild Language. OOCness.
1. So It Begins

[A/N and Disclaimer: Ichigo still has powers. I own nothing]

Chapter 1: So It Begins

What's up?

Rhetorical question, I don't really care.

I'm Ichigo Kurosaki.

Resident bad-ass.

I have a quick temper. My hair color looks unnatural but yes its real. I scowl a lot and give off don't fuck with me vibes (that no one takes serious until they get their ass handed to them). I'm the indifferent character. If only my apathy could kill (insert sad face). Did I mention that I'm also the main character of this here story. Oh, how can tell? I'm hott with two T's and sit by the window in every class duh [A/N Anime rule #1 and 4]. Okay, enough with the foreplay there's a story to be told.

So there I was, second period, nonchalantly gazing out the window up at the clouds. I sighed thinking, 'this is gonna be a boring ass day'. I take a gander down at the school yard below when BAM! I see something odd. It's blue and moving. I couldn't really make out what it was until it jumps up. It no HE landed on the windowsill in front of me. He's that one psycho espada guy. Grimmjow Jeagerjaques. He started eyeing me all weird like and grinning. 'Wait, isn't he spose to be dead? The big dipper killed him right!' I questioned myself. 'No I must be seeing things, yeah that's it. So maybe I need to start paying attention in class. Right just do that.' I turned my head to Miss. Educator who was rambling on about how to two squares make a pie or something or another when there's a knock on the window. Before I set myself up for something I'll regret, I take a look-see around the class.

'Okay the classroom seems to be in the norm.' Some kids actually paying attention-some probably don't know what the day is, the usual. (More knocking.) Most important though, I took a peak at Uryu, Chad, and Orihime. They were cool so I shifted back to the teacher. (The knocking became persistent.) 'maybe I'm hearing things. I know if I look to my left and that guy is still there I'm up shits' creek though.' So what did I do? I pray. I prayed 'Dear God, please please please don't let me be hunted but this lunatic. Hot yeah but still crazy. How about anyone but him. I swear I won't hit another person this whole week if you pull through on this one. Amen.' (The knocking has turned into banging at that point.) 'Oh come on, how am I the only one that hears this!' I mentally screamed. I glance around the room again. Everyone is still oblivious. The knocking stops. 'Man up and see what the hell he wants!' To prove that I still have a pair, I directed my body to the window and see Not. A. Thing. Absolutely nothing.

Relief washed over. I might be going crazy but hey that's 100% better then getting stalked by that insane bastard right? Right.

"Yo, Kurosaki... what's up man. It's been a while." Dread, unadulterated dread floods my entire system. Snapping to my right, there he was. Sexy number six. Alive? He's just chilling on top of some chicks' desk; head in palm, legs cross like he's meant to be there. And she's just looking through him. I feel sick. "HaHaHa!" He laughs in utter glee. "What's wrong? You look like you shit yourself!"

And what runs through mind: I think I just shat myself...


	2. Sigh

[A/N and Disclaimer: Ichigo still has powers. I own nothing]

Chapter 2: Sigh...

I was at a lost. '_What to do, what to do?_' The only thing I could think to do was try and act oblivious. '_Maybe If I ignore him, he'll go away. That logic always works on TV!_' I knew I got caught already but still... I mean I couldn't do or say anything to the guy without drawing attention to myself and that would be a bother. Trying to take this situation outside and go "full reaper"on his crazy ass was not even an idea since I left my badge at home this morning. (Damn frosted flakes had me running behind! _Tony the Tiger needs an foot up his ass._) I wasn't scared of the "Ex-Espada" by the way. I wasn't ready to acknowledge his existence yet. So I turn face first to Ms. Educator. I take noticed that his laughter dyes slightly as my attention is directed elsewhere. He's still sitting on the girls desk next to mine "Hey, I wanna fight you so get the hell up and let me whoop your ass again."

Groaning to myself '_Please don't start anything while I'm in class. I don't feel like confrontation and I can't possibly fight right now. __Not this early__._' I laid face first into my desk. My arms surrounded my head as a make shift barrier, blocking any rogue Espada from sight. I was tired anyways so I figured that if I lay my head down on my the desk than I'll fall asleep. If I fell asleep and woke up from this crazy fuck up dream, life would go back to it's usual fucked up craziness and make sense again. But it was not to be. To the right of me I felt his dark intimidating aura hovered over my body. "Smack, smack, smack, smack." He emphasized every word when his fist repeatedly pounded down onto my cranium. And no, he was not smacking the top of my head. More like punching the shit out of it. "Hey Light Bright! Are you ignoring me!"

'_Be cool Ichigo_' I told myself. '_Your a Kurosaki damn it! Stay strong,_ maybe he'll pleasantly fade away_ and this terror will be over. Buck up champ.'_ His punches stopped when he got no response. "HEY, YOU ARE AIN'TCHU!" He accused as if he were offended. "You fucker I'm talking to you, you no manners have'n bastard. I said FIGHT me!" At that point he's yelling his lungs out. '_Jus wait it out Ichi. Don't let him get to you._'

"Ohhhh, I get it! You're scare ain'tcha. HA! I always knew you were a pussy kid. I can smell it on ya'." I felt my face heating in anger. '_I DO NOT SMELL!_' I mentally shrieked. To him it looked as though he was getting no reaction what so ever from me, so he decided to continue. "Like really I should'a known from the hair. I mean, it's just as bad as Aporro's '_**I have a flaming vag'**_ hair color." Grimmjow's so close now, his breath is fanning over my forearm. Then he starts jabbing his finger in my side under the writing table all the while cackling like the deranged lunatic that he is. This was getting very annoying really fast. "So... tell me, do I need to come back when you're off the rag? Huh?" I felt as though I'd explode at any moment. '_I knew he was a persistent MF but damn this was beyond ridiculous_.'

"Hellllloooooo... Kurosaki said I'm bored, lets fight already. Hey, is it cause you know I'm better than you that you won't fight me? Where's your balls at man!" His condescending tone was really pissing me off. "Hey kid I know your bitch ass hear me. Smack, smack, smack, smack." He's at it with this shit again. ''I know you're not sleep, no one falls asleep that fast." He's still clobbering my brain into the table. It hurts. " 'Cept Cyot' [Stark] and your not him! He's dead so GET UP!" Next thing I know, the pain is my skull has advanced through my entire backside.

As I glared and scowled at the ceiling from the my position on floor, I now realized the fucker flipped my small desk onto it's side. Thus a very unhappy me is sprawled onto the ground very unhappily. I than took a glace over at Mr. Sixta whose blocked my view of whatsherface. I wish she could see him. He had the nerve to be doubled over, manic laughter booming off the four walls with his ass all in her face. I couldn't take his teasing or his smug handsome face. Or the way he kept staring at me with those sly mischief gleaming orbs of beautiful blue. Handsome/Beautiful or not, he hit my breaking point. I couldn't' handle him anymore. I was sick of his pestering, I was furious. It was then that I snapped.

"WHAT THE FUCK YOU SON NA BITCH!" I sprung upward, desk gripped ready to be chucked at the smirking head of a soon to be dead (again) Espada. "You know what? I've got no damn problem wit kicking your ass. I've done it before. Yes, I have balls you piece of shit. You got a real good taste of them when I whipped your ass all across Hueco Mundo remember? And how can you call ME a pussy when you turn into a bloody feline for fuck's sake. If anything YOU are the biggest pussy I know. Leave my hair out of this, shut the FUCK UP and leave ME the hell alone!"

After my hysterical outburst, I noticed that the classroom went silent. Complete and utterly silent. It was then that I remembered the other occupant's in the room. I glanced left and right. All eyes, wide and horrified and some slightly amused, were trained on me. Solely on me. '_That's right. They can't see him __and I just made an absolute dick of myself__..._.. _damn-it_ _I let him get to me_.' I turned my attention back to Grimmjow, who just stared at me with this satisfied smug expression I couldn't quite place and a strange heat in his eyes. He licked his lips and I got a chill. "Come on Soul Reaper. Now that you're awake lets go have some fun." he said. Grimmjow looked as if he was ready to cut me up into small itty bitty pieces and devour me. That dread from early came rushing back into my being. I didn't feel like dealing with this guy.

I couldn't stomach the ferocity his teal eyes held so I considered the class again. From their standpoint, it looked as though I just cursed out the nameless chick next to me for no apparent reason. Oh, not to mention the desk held above my head was poised crush her. With a blanched face she looked like she was on the brink of tears and pissing herself at the same time. '_I should feel bad shes gonna take this personal, but sadly I don't care. She'll be okay._' The teacher is yelling from the front of the room for me to place my table back into its rightful position. Damn it! Another "ghost" got me into trouble. "Ichigo Kurosaki! I do not appreciate that type of language in my classroom! You will also not threaten any of my students with objects over 10 pounds and four inches! Principle's office young man!" I lower the miniature student prison on to the floor sighing "Ain't this bouta bitch." out loud.

"I said NO CURSING!" The instructor barked. After I gathered my few things, I faced the asshole formally known as Grimmjow Jeagerjaques whose chuckling lowly to himself watching my every move. "Once I get outta this, I gonna beat your ass back into the same bloody plump that was left in the sands. And if I get me suspended, I'm gonna do way more than that." I spit with all the hatred I could muster for being majorly pissed off yet slightly embarrassed by my actions. Bitterly I stormed passed the asshole, my classmates and my teacher. I was determined to get the hell out of that classroom. As I made it out the door my only reply was "You bet your sweet ass Reaper.", the espada's howling laughter along with whispers from the students. And the nameless girls' exaggerated bawling.

_'I should feel bad._'

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><p>My sense of humor is weird, I know. Hope some of you like it. Thanks Kiren and pencilsandpens for the reviews and others for reading.<p> 


	3. For the Love of Tits!

[A/N and Disclaimer: Soooo yeah its been a while hasn't it. I wanna give a special thanks to Kiren and loveholic. Kiren motivated me to start a while back and loveholic gave me the inspiration to finished this chapter. Another thanks to the people who reviewed and read this thing XD! Warning: Grimm's MIA in this chapter and I still own nothing.]

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><p>Chapter 3: For the Love of Tits!<p>

I sat in the principals office for the better or worst part two hours that day awaiting punishment only to find out that I had a two day suspension. 'This is complete and utterly bullshit. Fucking Jeagerjaques is a dead man.' my thoughts boiling murder as I walked home. Apparently, Orihime had claimed the chick down and my sentence was reduced severely. I'll have to thank her later. First things first, when I get home I'm getting that badge and going on a witch hunt for the blue haired devils ass. My foot was dying to get a taste. I can't believe all this went down, it s only 11:30am. I made an total ass of myself today.

Once home, still impossibly enraged, frustrated and fuming I made my way through the empty threshold, straight to my bedroom to find that damn soul badge. After locating it on the floor underneath my desk, I pressed the thing to my chest and got the hell outta there. 145 pounds of body fell limp onto the ground with a loud thud. I didn't care. I wanted fucking answers and I was going to get them. I flash stepped on rooftops for a couple of blocks trying to sense the Dick faces' spiritual pressure. Not being that good at, it took me longer than the average reaper to determine that the asshole had vanished. No reminisce of him was left behind but I could feel Rukia close by and that is where I headed.

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><p>Five minutes later, Ichigo was face to face atop a convenience store with the short, up tight and... football geared clad Rukia. She looked absolutely ridiculous. The shoulder pads the girl donned where worn over her usual reaper attire and way to big for her small body. There where elbow and knee pads as well. The brunette displayed the perfect expression of a pathetically frightened puppy. To bad the guy could care less about what troubled the Kuchiki. "Rukia what the hell are you wearing? Wait never mind, you were spose to be patrolling Karakura. How in fucks name did you let an espada pass through?" He all but shouted, knowing deep down she couldn't take Grimm out by herself. [AN: You'll have to excuse Ichi-bear. His pride is hurt.]

Ichigo took noticed to the hard flinch Rukia provided once she heard the sound of his voice. Also taking note of wringing fidgety hands and nervous way she shuffled from foot to foot. "For special training and well... you see...what had happened was..." She began to explain only to get lost in thought and become more erratic. "WHAT HAPPENED! Grimmjow (lucky living number 6 of Aizen's very dead insane clown posse) Jeagerjaques roamed throughout this whole town today. Oh, and not to mention paid me a surprise visit at school all on YOUR watch! What if he killed someone? And why couldn't Chad, Orihime, and the freak not see him? You know something don t you. SPILL!"

After Ichigo's little tirade, Rukia took a very deep breath before looking the sub-reaper in the eyes, fear rolling in waves throughout her whole being. "They could see him." she said in her smallest voice possible. The only remark Ichigo could produce was to give an indignant "huh?" before Rukia lost it. "They could see him dammit! We all can!" she huffed out. If Ichigo's appalled, confused, pissed expression and gaping mouth was anything to go by, he was probably about to quirk a equally angry appalled question her way but was cut off before a sound came out. "Look he took something very dear to your friends and is holding those 'THINGS' hostage until he is able to have his 'FUN' with you. That's why Uryu, Orihime, and Chad didn't intervene earlier." Rukia yelled. "I don't understand. Took what from them? And why didn't you guys let me or the Soul Society know that something was wro-"

"WE COULDN'T! There was to much at risk. You... you wouldn't understand Ichigo." The elevation of her voice died down to a mere whisper. Ichigo could not believe his eyes. The strong willed-self assured Chappy Bunny lover, Miss. Rukia Kuchiki herself looked as though she was brink of tears. "How are you at risk Rukia? Claim down and tell me. And what the hell did Grimmjow take that was so important?" Exasperated and confused was the only way to described Ichigo s face. "When I saw them this morning before school, we all had encountered him and had separate conversations by that time with the espasda. The items Jeagerjaques has are classified to each individual and will remain that way until his plan his carried out. Then and only then will the articles be returned to their rightful owners."

Okay screw exasperated, mortification washed over Ichigo's face. "So what, you guys are just gonna let that idiot do what ever he wants? You people are insane. The Soul Society! They should be crawling all over this place. Where are they?" not that he actually wanted to SS to interfere with his home town any more than they had in the past or killed the sexy evil prick or at least let Ichigo have a go first, the question had just been bugging the shit outta him all day. "You see, he s found a way to mask his spiritual pressure a great deal. You can't feel it until he s a couple meters distant. The sixta just kinda appeared from thin air looking for you and some 'fun'." As Rukia spoke her confidence began to return. "They can't sense him up there and I am not informing them of this situation! There is nothing we can do Ichigo, we need you to defuse this bomb so we all can go back to living our respected lives. She emphasized word 'living' with a violent stomp of her left foot making her shoulder pads jump.

"What is he planning?" the red head asked pinching the bridge of his nose. It's not that he cared, he was just genuinely curious. The urge to see the blue haired bastard formed in the pit of Ichigo's stomach. He wanted to see that smirk again. Than pummel the shit out that pretty face. 'Yeah, that sounds lovely.' the sub-reaper thought as the corner of his mouth upturn a little. "We do not know what his intentions are with you Ichigo. All we know is that he came here FOR you. Sorry Ichi, but you have to give yourself over to him... for the greater good of your friends."

"Wha- Oh hell no. Nuuuuuu-ahhhhhhh!" the now again fuming teen declared, shake his head left to right. "Why should I? All of my suppose to be friends sold me out including you. The fuck you want me to do, find the guy and lick his boots? And you know if Orihime, Chad, and Uryu has something precious on the line, what do you have to loss huh?"

"MY BREAST!" Rukia screamed as she fell to the ground hugging her shoulder pad cover bosom for dear life. She began to sob uncontrollably. "He threatened to shove his hand throw my chest again. I can't take that pain. No, not again. NOT AGAIN!" she howled. "Are you serious, that's what your scared of! That's why you're wearing football equipment? To protect your non-existent tits? Rukia wept in the fetal position rocking back and forth. Do you know that a hand through the torso is one of the most common things to happen to us soul reapers? It's happened to everyone including me, like five times, it's not that bad. A little painful at first but you'd get use to it." He tried to convince the bawling woman only to reconcider. "You know what, fuck this. Rukia you re acting like a baby... I'm out."

He turned away, flash stepping in the direction of his home leaving the pitiful, crying, and distraught Rukia in a puddle of her own tears. Ichigo made a promise to himself. To get what he wanted and that was answers, Grimmjow blood, and some sleep. Whichever came first. He wouldn't be picky.

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><p>Told you before, weird sense of humor. Don't hate me :(. Oh, if there is anything wrongmistakes or if y'all have any suggestions please let me know. Thanks again to loveholic, Kiren, pencilsandpens, and Rena.


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